Comments on: Monsters: Updated!

By: Dear the Internet: « Threat Quality Press

Dear the Internet: « Threat Quality Press — Wed, 01 Apr 2009 20:13:26 +0000

[...] Dear the Internet: Are you really that interested in seeing pictures of the Montauk Monster? You’ve looked up the Montauk Monster over two thousand times today! And yet, not ONE SEARCH for the fabled Moscow Monster. [...]

By: threatqualitypress

threatqualitypress — Thu, 09 Oct 2008 12:46:52 +0000

Threat Quality Press:

Changing lives for the better!

(Also appeasing Cthulhu)

By: V.I.P. Referee

V.I.P. Referee — Thu, 09 Oct 2008 04:35:23 +0000

“Facultative bipedalism”. I’m embarassed for all of you, really. I don’t pretend to be the absolute authority on “Russe Squatinidae Wombaticus” but I suppose in some environments, my rare experience sets me apart from…you.

On a warmer note: As of now, I officially believe in everything “Threat Quality Press” has to say. I’ve reevaluated my view of technology, exerienced the emotional and intellectual pangs of reading great work and committed to a 3-year subscription of “Cat Fancy”…all because of “Threat Quality Press”. Thanks, TQP!

By: threatqualitypress

threatqualitypress — Thu, 09 Oct 2008 03:34:27 +0000

We’ll have to see, now that he’s been knocked down, if he gets up again.

By: Hsiang

Hsiang — Thu, 09 Oct 2008 02:33:19 +0000

It’s definitely not a chupacabra, no pinstriping. Might be a chumbawumba.

By: matt

matt — Wed, 08 Oct 2008 19:26:26 +0000

You’re all a bunch of freaks. And you give hill billies a bad name. For shame. For shame!

By: Jeff Holland

Jeff Holland — Wed, 08 Oct 2008 16:09:58 +0000

“Moscow Hell Best” is a great name for a band.

By: threatqualitypress

threatqualitypress — Wed, 08 Oct 2008 14:31:20 +0000

Was it you? Did you make this heinous monstrosity?

ADMIT IT, VIP! YOU ARE THE MAD SCIENTIST BEHIND THE MOSCOW HELL BEST!

By: V.I.P. Referee

V.I.P. Referee — Wed, 08 Oct 2008 04:52:25 +0000

Why does it look like the man-eating plant from “Little Shop of Horrors”? What eccentric but brilliant genetibiomarinemutantologist—perhaps handsome in that bookish, madcap sort of way…swirling beakers at midnight, lonely but passionate–could allow such a creature to arise from the hands of science, only to release it upon an unsuspecting insurance salesman?

By: threatqualitypress

threatqualitypress — Mon, 06 Oct 2008 19:56:30 +0000

The owlbear is the most ridiculous of creatures ever fabricated by Dungeons and Dragons. Obviously, Erin's claims are outlandish, as the Montauk Monster clearly has teeth, and an owlbear does not. Moreover, Skeksis haven't existed as non-gestalt entities since the re-assemblage of the crystal of truth during the last Great Conjunction in 1982. While I'm no alarmist, I think there's good reason to be alarmed.