Comments on: Varieties of Marriage

By: Exciting News: OPEN SUBMISSIONS! « Threat Quality Press

Exciting News: OPEN SUBMISSIONS! « Threat Quality Press — Mon, 03 Aug 2009 15:26:12 +0000

[...] Superman, reviews of movies or books or comic books that are pretty cool (or hilariously bad), and humorous essays on a variety of [...]

By: threatqualitypress

threatqualitypress — Tue, 05 May 2009 17:58:54 +0000

@Mary Jones: Oh, a lesson in not changing history from Mr. I’m My Own Grandfather.

By: Jeff Holland

Jeff Holland — Tue, 05 May 2009 05:11:09 +0000

@Mary Jones: Fry did indeed do the nasty in the past-y.

By: Hsiang

Hsiang — Tue, 05 May 2009 00:53:45 +0000

This am beautiful. I are in love.
Will you Para-marry me?

By: Erin

Erin — Tue, 05 May 2009 00:29:54 +0000

Braak: Awesome. Just awesome. All I got to say.

By: Mary Jones

Mary Jones — Mon, 04 May 2009 23:22:14 +0000

Also, if Marty had traveled back in time and married his mother, how would you define that? If you think that's bad, you should watch Futurama--"All's Well That's Roswell". Cause nothing makes marriage fun like an ontological paradox.

By: Jeff Holland

Jeff Holland — Mon, 04 May 2009 20:31:56 +0000

Hmm. If you married your own mother in the past, but came to your present to live in wedded (if constantly questioned) bliss, I believe that would be pan-temporal marriage.

It would also be a lead-in to an easy joke about marrying a Pizza Hut pizza, but I’m tired now, so I’ll let someone else bother.

By: threatqualitypress

threatqualitypress — Mon, 04 May 2009 19:59:22 +0000

Marrying your mother, time travel or no, has ancient historical precedent, so I guess it would count as a traditional marriage.

By: V.I.P. Referee

V.I.P. Referee — Mon, 04 May 2009 19:48:17 +0000

…maybe if we had a diagram? Also, if Marty had traveled back in time and married his mother, how would you define that? This all makes me very nervous—pageant teeth are meant for smiling, not talking.

By: threatqualitypress

threatqualitypress — Mon, 04 May 2009 15:48:36 +0000

No, “takebacks” are definitely a kind of proto-unmarriage.

I guess the question is whether “opposite marriage” means “the marriage of opposites” or “the opposite of marriage.”