Desert Island Actors
You are trapped on a desert island, with no hope of rescue. The island is so small that exploring it will only engage your interest for a week or two, tops. There is no companionship, nobody to talk to, not even so much as a volleyball to stuff with hair and imbue with a personality. (On the other side of things, you are a pretty serviceable fisherman, so food is not a serious concern.)
What you DO have, is a TV and DVD player, hooked to an otherworldly, eternal power source. And a plane is coming, with a cargo full of DVDs that it just might drop onto your tiny island. You have just enough rocks at your disposal to write the names of three actors or actresses that the plane might see.
“Well, why don’t I write something like ‘SOS’?” I hear you asking. “Or at the very least, list a bunch of directors? And how do I know this plane has DVDs? This whole scenario is flawed!”
Well, to paraphrase the theme to Mystery Science Theater 3000, “Just repeat to yourself, ‘It’s just a game, I should really just relax.’” But if you need an in-story reason, let’s say your brain is addled from the constant sun and lack of a satisfying meal. All you’re thinking about is actors and actresses.
So you’ve got the rocks. You can signal the plane to drop down the entire filmography of THREE (3) actors or actresses. But remember, this is it: whatever you ask the plane to drop down, that’s what you’re stuck with for the rest of your natural life. All the good stuff, all the bad.
What three names do you write down?
To get the ball rolling, I think I would signal for:
George Clooney (I like the vast majority of Clooney’s movies – and given enough time, I might even schedule “Batman and Robin Sundays” for myself, depending on just how insane I’ve become)
Johnny Depp (gets me a lot of Tim Burton movies, and who knows, maybe “21 Jump Street” is a really good show and I’ve just never given it a chance)
William H. Macy (a few Coen bros. movies, along with plenty of supporting roles in potentially interesting indie films I’ve never even heard of).
And you, discerning readers? Perhaps you want to go with a solid stand-by like DeNiro, or perhaps Tilda Swinton? Or maybe you want a solid character-actor like Clancy Brown (there are worse hells than watching Buckaroo Bonzai, Shawshank Redemption, and “Superman”/”Justice League” cartoons). What actor or actress would you allow to entertain you for the rest of your tortured island existence?