Christopher Nolan: I am here to help.
Archive for July, 2010
A Horrible Dream Where You’re Robin
Posted in comic books, Jeff Holland, Threat Quality with tags Batman, comics are insane, Death in the Family, Jeff Holland, Robin, Threat Quality on July 20, 2010 by braak
22-year-old spoiler alerts ON!
So, you guys know the Joker once beat Robin near death with a crowbar and then blew him up inside a Red Cross tent, right?
And then Batman recovered the body, removed the shreds of his Robin costume and, as Bruce Wayne, lied about his death and held a funeral for him just to keep his identity secret, right?
That was a thing that actually happened. (Well, not “actually,” but you see where I’m coming from with this.)
Oh, also? Read more »
The Next Generation of iPad!
Posted in Braak with tags Braak, iglasses, iPad on July 19, 2010 by braak
What will it be able to do? Exciting things, I’ll bet. Probably more than just watch Star Trek. (Though, maybe not).
My impeccable sources in Apple headquarters tell me you’ll need accessories, though.
Doctor Who
Posted in Braak with tags Braak, Doctor Who, macgyver on July 19, 2010 by braakThis new Matt Smith cat is pretty good, I’m okay with it.
I’m very interested in the fact that he is a science-nerd hero.
My Apocalypse Mix Tape
Posted in Doomsday, Jeff Holland, Some Velvet Morning, Threat Quality with tags Apocalypse, Jeff Holland, Johnny Cash, playlists, Threat Quality, Tom Waits on July 16, 2010 by braakBased on the news, every day, for the last decade-to-century, I’m more or less certain the apocalypse will come in our lifetime. (Not just “my” lifetime – “our.” GO TEAM!)
I’m not really sure what form it’ll take. Oceans become irreversibly toxic? Zombie outbreak? Atmosphere has brain-eating bits of cadmium 
in it? ‘Roid-raging Carrot Top clone army armed with batzookas (bazookas with bat-wings, which are as groan-worthy as they are catastrophically destructive)?
You can’t even guess at this point.
I do know two simple truths – bestowed upon me by the sacred Book of Eli. First, God will grant me magical samurai powers as long as I’m carrying some form of Bible (even, I’m assuming, an Itty-Bitty Bible for easy transport), and second, my MP3 player may still work.
But only if I find a junk shop run by Tom Waits. Which, rest assured, will be my primary mission as I wander the scorched-earth remnants of the United States.
Which is why I thought it prudent to create this apocalypse playlist. Read more »
Thak Spleeneater: History and Etymology
Posted in Braak with tags Braak, language, orcs on July 15, 2010 by braakInspired by this io9 article about creating made-up languages. This is a super-fun exercise for my brain.
Presented to the Royal Academy of History
by Eigon Tershwiller, Second Fellow
Historical research can often yield conclusions that are the reverse of prevailing opinions. Consider, in this case, the infamous 8th century half-orc warlord called Thak Spleeneater. He was known, for many decades, as a terrible combatant and a ruthless general, though there is little historical evidence suggesting he was present at any of the battles he was purported to have participated in. The only confirmed history, the account of the Battle of Avenhrad by Lord Katarostos (in modern Canthi usually referred to as “Lord Cross”), is loaded with personal bias.
Superman Hobo Signs
Posted in Threat Quality on July 15, 2010 by braakDamn it, Holland! How come WE aren’t this funny!?!?!?
Big Dumb Objects
Posted in books, Braak, poetics with tags big dumb objects, Braak, SF/F on July 14, 2010 by braak
This is something that turned up on Jonathon McCalmont’s blog, he’s reviewing a book called Wolfsangel, and he wants to delve into the idea of the Big Dumb Object, which is a term I hadn’t really heard before. Is it possible, he asks, to create a fantasy Big Dumb Object? (I’m paraphrasing that, obviously.)
The whole idea is interesting, and I want to consider it.
Theater vs. Nazis: The Producers
Posted in Braak, poetics, theater with tags Braak, criticism, nazis, The Producers, theater, theatre on July 13, 2010 by braakTwo today, because Holland tricked me by posting yesterday. I have a hard time knowing what day it is, and it’s not helpful when Holland CHANGES THE SCHEDULE WITHOUT WARNING. Sweet zombie Jesus, is it Wednesday? Tuesday? I don’t god-damn know.
Anyway, here’s a thing I wrote about The Producers, over at my new theater-project blog. It counts as a TQP post, too, I have decided.
I saw a local theater’s production of Mel Brooks’ musical The Producersa few weeks ago. Entirely by coincidence, I happened to be there during the talk-back session. Now, I’ve participated in talk-back sessions before, so I should have known better than to ask serious questions; most of the time, a talk-back is just another opportunity for the actors to blush beneath the gushing weight of the audience’s praise. It’s not unreasonable; when are you going to see most of these people again? If you want them to say something nice about you, you need to seize the opportunity.
Superman: Jesus, But With More Punching
Posted in comic books, Jeff Holland, Threat Quality with tags Batman, Grant Morrison, Jeff Holland, Mark Millar, Mark Waid, Superman, Threat Quality on July 13, 2010 by braak
After a week of trying and failing to get a handle on Wonder Woman, I thought it best to get back to basics with the character everybody seems to get, and here is what I have concluded:
Superman fans are strange.
Because as near as I can tell, they want a Christ Figure who will beat people up for them.
Wait – I might have to go back a bit.
DC used the recent, landmark release of Superman #700 to close out their previous Big Superman Story, something involving a New Krypton, while also introducing the next story – J. Michael Strazcynski’s year-long “Grounded”, which is set to feature Superman walking the Earth (yes, like Caine in “Kung Fu”) to better get in touch with the common man he’s trying to protect.
Superman fans have not taken this well (sadly, I feel I write the phrase “Fans have not taken this well” an awful lot). Read more »
