Archive for April, 2012

So, I have been reading this website, Requires Only That You Hate.  It is very refreshing.  The woman who writes it is angry, and unapologetic, and has drawn the attention of a lot of different science fiction and fantasy writers who probably imagined that they were super-progressive and are off-put by how gleefully and viciously Requires reminds them that they’re not.  It makes me feel bad, sometimes, to see the sacred cows of SF/F just slaughtered — like, killed and then tied to a truck and driven a hundred miles down the road and then set on fire and thrown off a cliff and then maybe the truck is thrown off the cliff on top of the slaughtered cow.  I feel bad, but in a good way — like, is there a way that your sense of ego can get kicked around and it will be sore the way that your body is sore after a good workout?  You hurt, but you hurt in a new and interesting way?

All of this has made me reconsider a couple of my positions on things, but mostly it’s led me to construct an elaborate metaphor.

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Previously, on Wonder Woman: Wonder Woman stole a dude’s blood, scorned due process, got weepy watching The Notebook, publicly accused someone without any evidence to back up her claim, read her board the riot act after Wonder Woman dolls came back with boobs that were too big, and then I’m pretty sure Elizabeth Hurley made a fellatio pun. ONWARD!

Here we come to part two of “Wonder Woman’s Vigilante Reign of Terror,” where, after stopping in to check on the ill black teen, she pops over to another hall of the hospital, where the Perp From Act I is being kept under guard.

First, she threat-flirts with the tiny police officer. “Do you like my outfit, officer? This outfit opens doors for me.” I don’t even know what her goal is there.

Then she’s grudgingly let in to see the guy by a hilariously bedraggled (oh, how loosened in frustration his neck-tie is!) detective, who literally tells the little cop to “Beat it!” and gives Wonder Woman her “just ten minutes” with the bed-ridden, arrested Perp.

This is where shit goes from a 50/50 hilarious/awkward ratio to full-on 100% Are-You-Kidding-Me.  (more…)

I was having a bad day. So oh man. It’s a good thing tonight was the night I decided to track down that Wonder Woman pilot that NBC passed on.

Tracked down…oh, I’ve grown wistful of the days you’d actually have to dig around comic-cons for a bootleg VHS of that awful Justice League pilot, or hope to catch a screening of Roger Corman’s  low-budget Fantastic Four movie. Now, failure is so easily accessible.

The geek-kids today have it too easy, is what I’m saying.

Anyway, yes, there is no greater pick-me-up than the Wonder Woman pilot, which almost plays as a parody of superhero TV shows in how Totally Wrong-Headed it all is. And while there are many, many problems, and oh, I will get to them, but the biggest one is this:

David E. Kelley seems to think Wonder Woman is Batman, if Batman was an attractive young woman in a shiny halter-top.  (more…)

So, now you are a writer, great! You have probably made a lot of characters in your writing, and gone to classes, and done workshops, and read a bunch of books, you probably know about ten times more on this subject than I do. And yet here you are, reading what I, BRAAK!, have to say about writing, as though I know what the fuck I’m talking about.

Well, since you’re here, let’s talk about how to humanize a character, and let’s be real about it, you know? Just. Real.

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QUICK! I am writing down all of my thoughts about this before I have time to organize them. Spoilers follow the jump, DON’T READ THEM unless you have seen the movie. It is a pretty good movie, and it is worth seeing, and don’t find out anymore about it than that.
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I’ve been puzzling around this for a while, but have you ever noticed how many Epic Fantasies are quest narratives? I mean, a lot of it is couched in war, that’s a pretty common feature of epic fantasies. But for the most part – I think maybe nine times out of ten – the Epic Fantasy is defined by the fact that the central engine of the story is a small group of people Going Somewhere to Do Something. All those stories that followed Tolkien’s mold, you know, they’re about people taking a long trip in a strange land.
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