Friday Randomizer

Posted: October 16, 2009 in Braak

It’s Friday, let’s see about some crazy shit in the news.  There was Balloon Boy, that was a trip.  I found myself hugely disinterested in the brouhaha when everyone thought he’d floated off, before it turned out to be a hoax.  I mean, yeah, scary for the kid (maybe?  He is six.  Six year olds get scared in weird ways), but odds are the balloon was going to come down somewhere, right?  And even if he was doomed to fly off into space and die there–well, look:  shitty things happen to people all the time, kids even.  I don’t really see how my constant attention or hysteria is going to help this one.  What made this news, exactly, except that a balloon was involved?  I don’t know.

There’s this, did you hear about this guy?  Louisiana Justice of the Peace refused a marriage license to an inter-racial couple, on account of how troublesome it would be for their children.  As though 1) they couldn’t have children without being married, 2) they couldn’t be married without having children, or 3) any trouble their kids might have had wouldn’t have come from racists asshats like this guy, anyway.

“Yeah, I just can’t in good conscience give a marriage license to an inter-racial couple,” he says.  “Because of all the troubles their kids will have to deal with.  I mean, among other things, do you know how hard it will be for them to get a marriage license when they’re grown?”

I suppose it’s not an accident that most racists are also morons; I wish that they weren’t allowed to be judges, though.

And, let’s see.  Oh!  Finally, here’s a link about a study that shows that woman who are (or think of themselves as) overweight lose self-esteem when they look at pictures of any kind of model, “plus”-sized or no.  Underweight women do not.  I don’t know why this is, I think it’s a good reason to just build a machine that takes all of your measurements then creates a computer-model based on you, and shows you in the clothes.  And then maybe builds the clothes customized to your size and shape.  It can’t be that hard.  Somebody get those MIT guys on it.

Anyway, really I just linked to the article for the picture of Lizzi Miller, because whoah.  Oh, shit!  I’m contributing to the problem!

  1. Moff says:

    I dunno. Lots and lots of people watched a movie about a kid getting accidentally trapped in a floating balloon device, so I don’t see why it wouldn’t be fascinating in real life. I surely don’t think anyone had to pay attention, but I can understand why folks did. And aside from the spectacle value, it’s definitely justifiable news in that not only were public-sector resources deployed, but when kids go missing, it’s generally considered poor form not to put an APB out.

    My wife has written a really great blog post about stickers today, for people who DON’T want kids to float off into outer space.

  2. braak says:

    Yeah, but it’s not like the kid was lost. He was in the balloon! Everyone knew where he was! Well, actually, it turned out they didn’t because he was hiding in an attic the whole time, and deploying public resources to help with a publicity stunt IS kind of newsworthy, I guess.

    Also, I want to point out that, in addition to having a small boy trapped in a balloon-related device, Up also had talking dogs, a giant bird, and Ed Asner.

  3. Moff says:

    But this story had Larry King, who is like a talking dog.

    Also, I mean, dude, it was pretty wild. This was definitely more interesting than just falling down a well or getting kidnapped. I am excited to see the Law & Order take on it.

  4. braak says:

    Yeah, I guess it was pretty crazy.

    But next time a kid gets trapped in a balloon, somebody better god-damn interview Ed Asner about it.

  5. wench says:

    I thought the balloon story was interesting but refused to read it on the grounds that it was an ongoing emotional issue for the parents. Also I was too busy. But mostly, kid in balloon possibly about to die horribly before their eyes? Utterly terrifying for the helpless parents. I don’t want to see their fear on live TV. It’s intrusive to poke my nose into an emergency, even virtually, when I’m neither a part of the problem nor the solution.

    I would have been fascinated by heroic rescue efforts though (if they had occurred)… choppers with nets! air cannons with rescue ropes! That would have been totally awesome, and I would have downloaded it on youtube after the fact when the kid was dead or safe.

  6. Dave says:

    That Justice of the Peace story is nuts… The UK has something dealing with homophobia that is almost as ludicrous, and equally morally repugnant – Charlie Brooker has summed it up best with his reaction here.

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