Unemployed? Disenfranchised? Easily cowed? Time to join the winning team!
Sure, it may LOOK like I, Victor Von Doom, Grand Potentate and Undisputed (UNDISPUTED, YOU HEAR ME KRISTOFF?!) Ruler of the paradise nation of Latveria, have it all under my firm but benevolent control … but DOOM is only one man (and an army of Loyal DOOMbots, of course).
That is where you come in, jobseeker! DOOM is always on the lookout for skilled labor lackeys and unskilled labor peons alike, ready to do his bidding, die for his causes, and do some light typing and other administrative work.
Not sure you have the right experience? Don’t worry, we train on the job. All that’s required is a passion for serving DOOM, and of course, a burning hatred of Richards.
It’s a lot of work, but we have fun here, too. Once, while I was slaughtering dissidents on Casual Doomsday, I said to one of my DOOMbots, “I’m not sure if I rule a nation or a laughing house!”
No wait…I said “slaughterhouse.” IT WAS STILL HILARIOUS. ALL THE DOOMBOTS THOUGHT SO.
“DOOM” you have what it takes? (See? Fun!) Send your resume – insignificant though it may appear next to DOOM’S mighty accomplishments! – to our DOOMan Resources liaison, Stephen DOOMbot, c/o The Latverian Embassy.
DOOM LOOKS FORWARD TO COMMANDING YOU TO DO HIS BIDDING!