Dramaturgery: Wolverine 3: Madripoor Drift

Posted: August 3, 2013 in Action Movies, Braak, comic books
Tags: , , ,

W - MillerThe Wolverine was pretty okay, but I think we can all agree that there was room for improvement, and I think we all know what that improvement is. To that effect, I am going to write a treatment for the third installment of the Wolverine series. I am actually torn between this title and also Wolverine 3: Wolverine with a Vengeance, except I’m not sure how much vengeance I really want to make use of. Don’t worry about the title. Here we go.

Act 1

Wolverine and Yukio are on a plane. There is a storm, and the plane crashes (Yukio is not worried because she knows that they won’t die; Wolverine is worried because he is paranoid about crashing into water). Yukio has to wrestle Wolverine into the liferaft, it is challenging, Wolverine weighs like three hundred pounds.

They wash up on a smuggler’s beach in Madripoor, where they encounter some PIRATES, who mistrust them. Wolverine tells Yukio to tell them they don’t mean trouble. (Yukio: “They are Chinese.”) It doesn’t work. They have to fight the pirates. Some of the pirates are also NINJAS.

Act 2

Wolverine and Yukio go into Madripoor City, where they run afoul of drift-racing Yakuzas, who want to take over Madripoor from the Chinese pirates. Yukio has to DRIFT-RACE the Yakuzas. When she wins, the Yakuzas want to fight. They call in some NINJAS. Wolverine and Yukio fight the Yakuzas and the ninjas.

Act 3

While Wolverine and Yukio are fighting Yakuzas and Ninjas, the pirate clans comes back to Madripoor to get rid of the Yakuzas. They are lead by a GHOST PIRATE. No, by, like, a WIZARD PIRATE and his army of GHOST PIRATES. The ninjas have a MAGIC SWORD that they use to fight the ghost pirates. Wolverine and Yukio fight the ninjas and the Yakuzas and the ghost pirates. The ghost pirates fight the Yakuzas. The ninjas fight the ghost pirates.

Act 4

The ninjas use their magic sword to open a portal into past-times. Out of the portal comes a TYRANNOSAUR, and also VELOCIRAPTORS. Yukio and Wolverine fight the tyrannosaur and the velociraptors and the ninjas and the ghost pirates, but the Yakuzas DRIFT-RACE away.

Act 5

Wolverine and Yukio try to get the magic sword from the ninjas. The Yakuzas return with an army of ROBOT SHARKS. Wolverine and Yukio fight the ghost pirates, the ninjas, the Yakuzas, the velociraptors, the tyrannosaur, and the robot sharks.

They win.


Wolverine and Yukio get on a NEW plane, and take off, ready for new adventures.

  1. TheUnnamed says:

    How would they get the robot sharks on land, tornado? Like anyone would ever make a movie with tornado sharks! What would you even call it? Tornaharks? Ridiculous. Though Wolverine fighting ghost ninja pirate dinosaurs, totally going to see that movie.

  2. braak says:

    Robot sharks are amphibious, because of the tank treads.

  3. TheUnnamed says:

    Duh, tank treads. Thats why you have an interesting web site and I just leave random comments. Braakon.

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