Posts Tagged ‘guides’

Here’s the thing about the Superbowl:  some people like it.  It is important to them!  I’ve never really understood this; it’s not like, if one team wins then their quarterback is made king of America.  It’s not like if the Saints win we’ll be guaranteed bountiful harvests for a year.  Shit, at least the fucking GROUNDHOG has CONSEQUENCES.

Since all of my letters to the Government suggesting that the coach of the winning Superbowl team should be given one of Washington DC’s two Senate seats have been returned (UNOPENED, I should add), I have decided to make this guide, for men like me, who will be expected to watch the Superbowl, even though we don’t give a rat’s ass about football.