Threat Quality Press

No New Sci-Fi Part 2: “The Prisoner” Remake

Posted in Jeff Holland, Threat Quality, reviews with tags AMC, Jeff Holland, prisoner, Threat Quality on November 24, 2009 by threatqualitypress

I tried, with AMC’s “The Prisoner.” I really, really tried.

But if, after two hours of viewing, the only rational response to the material is, “My god, there’s four MORE hours of this?!” then, well…don’t be a hero, right?

I may have been more determined to like it, or at least appreciate it on some level, because to be perfectly honest, the entire internet ganging up on a six-episode miniseries actually evoked sympathy from me, in the same way as an abused puppy or a socially-awkward teenager might. I wanted to show “The Prisoner” that not everyone is Like That.

But no. No, it’s nearly impossible to struggle through. It is, as Matt Fraction put it, “Like watching paint dry, without the satisfaction of having painted anything.”

4 Comments »

On Warren Ellis, and His Ridiculous Self-Publishing Model

Posted in Braak, Curse You Warren Ellis, crotchety ranting with tags Braak, POD, warren ellis on November 23, 2009 by threatqualitypress

Warren Ellis, as you may know, recently released a book of his essays (I guess?) on Lulu. He and a friend of his knocked the thing together basically for no money, and now it’s for sale and people buy it. I haven’t bought it, because I’m not really that excited by Ellis’ criticism, but that’s neither here nor there.

What’s here is this: to any sensible person, this is a plan that obviously has no direct benefit to a person unless they are Warren Ellis. And, for some reason, any time anyone mentions that, Warren et al talk to us like we’re a bunch of lazy crybabies.

4 Comments »

Notes from the Convention: To Cory Doctorow

Posted in Braak with tags Braak on November 23, 2009 by threatqualitypress

Mr. Doctorow:

I am very, very sorry that I got loaded on Cruzan rum and then insisted I could headbutt your glasses off without touching your nose. You were right about that. Sorry.

–braak

1 Comment »

Hello, Philcon Attendee!

Posted in Threat Quality with tags philcon, Threat Quality on November 21, 2009 by threatqualitypress

If you are reading this, you have bought a copy of The Translated Man/Picked up a copy of our Broadsheet, and/or put up with our awkward attempts at conversation and salesmanship.

Thank you!

Please come back throughout the week for more dynamic essays, fiction, and sundry various bits of things.

(And if you were only thinking about buying The Translated Man, peer your peepers over to the right-hand side of the window – that’s where you can order a copy to call your own!)

Holy Cow!

Posted in Braak with tags Braak on November 20, 2009 by threatqualitypress

There is a guy here at Philcon that is selling Utilikilts!

Holland! You need to get down here and purchase one.

UPDATE: Bolo ties, everywhere!

3 Comments »

New Friday Adventure Project!

Posted in Braak, Jeff Holland, crushing genius with tags Braak, Holland, lovecraft, miskatonic, television on November 20, 2009 by threatqualitypress

In order to keep the blazing infernos of our respective creativities stoked, Holland and I periodically engage in exercises in fiction. Usually, this consists of me (because I spend most of my time bored and without human contact) e-mailing him and saying, “Hey, why don’t we do THIS crazy idea!,” and Holland responding with, “Okay, but let’s actually do it this way!” And so forth.

As you know, a while ago we finished up Hand of Danger (a project which began in much the same way), and so I threw out a new idea for the two of us to chew on, which we’ll be relaying in pieces for the next couple Fridays:

6 Comments »

No New Sci-Fi, part 1: “V”

Posted in Jeff Holland, Threat Quality, reviews with tags Jeff Holland, sci-fi, Threat Quality, V on November 19, 2009 by threatqualitypress

For all the complaining about how sci-fi doesn’t get a chance on TV – spurred by regular announcements of favorite shows getting cancelled (often in their second seasons, which I will soon develop a theory about) – fans seem to ignore just how much genre TV there actually is these days.

From the last year alone, both on network and cable: Lost, Supernatural, Fringe, Pushing Daisies, Terminator: Sarah Connor Chronicles, Eureka, Dollhouse, Reaper, Battlestar Galactica, Stargate Universe, Warehouse 13, Flashforward, The Prisoner, V, Torchwood, Dr. Who…and while the failure rate is far higher than the successes, let’s point out that Lost, Supernatural, the Stargate franchise and Smallville are (in some cases bafflingly – okay, just Smallville) pretty long-lived for TV series.

Now, argue left and right about the relative quality and/or unfair-cancellation of any of these shows, but there sure are a lot of them, considering every year I seem to come across a panicky “Is sci-fi on TV dead?” article or 10.

6 Comments »

Oh, Man, Do I Not Have Anything Today

Posted in Threat Quality with tags Braak on November 18, 2009 by threatqualitypress

I was going to relate the hilariously involved story of why I still don’t have cable internet at the house after TWO MONTHS. But the Comcast people seem like they’re trying, at least, and it’s always hard for me to be angry at people who are being friendly. So, I’m giving them the benefit of the doubt, and leaving off what would be, no doubt, an epic rant.

In the meantime, assorted news bits:

11 Comments »

I Will GIVE You a War on Christmas

Posted in Christmas, Jeff Holland, Threat Quality, crotchety ranting, religion, shitheads with tags Gap, Jeff Holland, Threat Quality, War on Christmas on November 17, 2009 by threatqualitypress

Dear people who are going to boycott GAP because it isn’t Christmassy enough:

Okay. Fine. I tried to ignore you. But you just won’t have it, will you? You people want a war on Christmas? I WILL GIVE YOU A GODDAMN WAR ON CHRISTMAS.

You fired the first shot, by making sure I heard “Feliz Navidad” piped through the speakers at Kohl’s on NOVEMBER 8. That’s right. You call it a war on Christmas, but over here on the other side of the fight, we call it the War on Keeping My Fucking Sanity For Just One More Damn Month. And you have claimed a valuable chunk of territory, called the Pre-Thanksgiving-November-Strait.

49 Comments »

The Curse

Posted in Braak with tags Braak, Short Fiction on November 16, 2009 by threatqualitypress

“You’ll have to excuse me,” she said, “but you don’t look very much like a witch doctor.” Olivia Austen Mortimer (Livvy to her friends and the women that ran the $3,000 a month infant-to-preschool daycare, “Miss Livvy” to the maid) said this with a certain tentativeness, equally concerned with her guest’s feelings as she was with his credentials.